Jeric's Journal 01 - Strange Days
Cowards. My personal attackers are all cowards. Hiding behind bows and taunts now. I guess I can’t blame them since I dispatched a handful of them already. Guess I’m just harder to kill than he thought. I felt a little remorse about the last one, as pretty as she was impressive with her daggers. I have to remind myself that they’re all just evil beings serving an evil being and the feeling passes. Every day that I am alive is akin to spitting in his face. It will have to do for now.
It was all so much easier before. I always knew or was told what to do and where to go. The battle was always right in front of me My family all around me. I find myself in a situation that is altogether new to me. In a place that is nothing like serving in the army or growing up doing militia work with home always just a stone’s throw away. I’m always looking over my shoulder now, but yet I feel freedoms that I’ve never experienced before, I can go down any path that I choose. When I stop to think about it I’m amazed at how quickly I collect loose threads. I wonder how my companions handle life on the road, and if it is as strange to them.
And what to make of my new companions? They are certainly nothing like having my family around, going into battle with them and relying on them as they knew they could rely on me. Not only do I not trust them, I don’t even know if I like some of them. I suppose I make an exception for Santos, the virtuous cleric. I feel that he’s as thoughtful and considerate as I am, however it may be that I find him currently at my side only because his God decided that our paths should intertwine. And I do feel a strange kinship with the little halfling. I would never show it but I do find his antics quite amusing at times. And even though he’s sometimes more trouble than he’s worth, I sense that his heart is always in the right place. I started off on the wrong foot with Taran, and although I don’t see yet how he fits in with the group but he has proved as tenacious as I am in battle. I’m doing my best to withhold judgement on the Ranger, but I’m always on high alert around him. He has questionable judgement and questionable morals. But since it seems no one else has taken umbrage with him then I do my best to give him slack. After all I really don’t know anything about him. But I do know that he is as reckless as a drunk hobgoblin at times. It may be up to me to do something about him at some point less he gets us all killed.
I don’t know if it’s the group that I travel with or something more, but I feel not only liberated, but stronger, more confident. I’ve given up all pretense concerning my name and my appearance. I may be hunted but I’m not living my life in fear, and I will no longer hide. Anything my companions do not know about me is only because they haven’t asked.
What I said before is false… there is one thing that I fear. I mourned the deaths of my father and my brother and I miss them terribly, but it’s the unanswered questions regarding my mother and my twin sister, Jenissa…
they gnaw at my soul.